Saturday, October 26, 2013

NFL Week 8 Preview/Picks

This week we were 9 for 11 with our picks

We here at ElTrolloLoco love the NFL. We also love gambling. Each week we will breakdown the games and pick a bet for each team, because let's face it; winning bets is an instant erection, 100% of the time.

Dallas at Detroit
Detroit -3, Over/Under 51
The game is at Detroit but I don't trust the Lions, or Dallas, for that matter. If it was straight up pick em, I'd go Dallas. However, bet on the Over as both of these two defenses let up more points than Lisa Ann has played Sarah Palin in porn

Buffalo at New Orleans
New Orleans -11, Over/Under 48.5
New Orleans at Home. I repeat New Orleans at home. I'm picking New Orleans -11. Insert Hurricane Katrina joke here.

NY Giants at Philadelphia
Philly -5, Over/Under 51.5
Philly hasn't covered at home in 11 straight games, so it may be wise to pick them here. I don't trust either team, or their defenses. I'd bet the under here.

San Francisco at Jacksonville (played in London)
San Francisco -16.5, Over/Under 40.5

Jacksonville can't get any breaks with homefield advantage or love from the bookies. In fact, Jacksonville will play once in London from now until 2016. Although betting on Jacksonville +16.5 is smart, the average score of London games since 2008 has been  51 total points. Im taking the Over

Cleveland at Kansas City
Kansas City -7.5, Over/Under 39.5
Cleveland has moved on to a new QB, again. Cleveland is that slut everyone knew in high school who dates somebody new every few weeks and is constantly getting fucked by their choices. Kansas City -7.5

Miami at New England
New England -6.5, Over/Under 45.5I was torn who to pick on this one because both teams refuse to win by more than 4 points. Tiebreaker time, which means which QB has the better WAG: Miami or New England. I'm going Gisele, foreign chicks make my dick sneeze harder than snorting a line of ground pepper. New England -6.5

NY Jets at Cincinnati
Cincinnati -6.5, Over/Under 41.5Geno Smith is the perfect Jets QB. Can't win games he's supposed to, wins games he's supposed to lose. Andy Dalton has been on fire recently, but dear god the he has the worst nickname I've ever heard (the Red Rifle.) Another tough pick; lets compare their respective slampieces. Geno or Andy?  I'm picking the Over on this game, because I don't think I'd like to be under either of them. 

Pittsburgh at Oakland
Pittsburgh -2.5, Over/Under 40.5
Honestly Im just rooting for Mychal Rivera scores to see his smokeshow sister dance again. If I was her, I would stay locked indoors with Ol' Ben the Rapist in town . This one is a crapshoot. But I'm betting smart, home underdogs against the Squealers.  Oakland +2.5

Washington at Denver
Denver -11.5, Over/Under 58
11 1/2 seems like a bit much for Denver to cover. RGIII has been heating up recently, which obviously has nothing to do with his beat wife.  You would think he could pull a little better than a soft 7, and that's a reach. I'm going out on a limb here and betting on Washington +11.5.

Atlanta at Arizona
Arizona -2.5, Over/Under 45
 Atlanta is banged up and notoriously bad against the spread (2-7 the last 9 games) and Arizona is, well, Arizona. Id' bet the under here.

Green Bay at Minnesota
Green Bay -9, Over/Under 47
There's a QB controversy in Minnesota. Josh Freeman's first start last week was awful, like he was shaving points. Pretty sure I could have had a better completion percentage. If  Freeman starts, Green Bay -9. If Christian Ponder starts, Green Bay -9. Also, lock me in for 100 dollars that one of these two eventually signs with the Browns by 2014.

Seattle at St. Louis
Seattle -11, Over/Under 43
Even though Seattle plays as about as well as the Browns on the road,Kellen Clemens starting in primetime against the Legion of Boom and the Seattle D. Remember when the Jets thought Clemens was the answer at QB? Yeah me neither. I'm taking Seattle -11

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